Mom’s Guide to the Unthinkable: Organising Kids’ Logistics
As mothers, we spend 90% of our brainpower planning our children’s futures. We plan the birthday parties, the school enrollments, the holiday camps, and the dentist appointments. We worry about their vegetables, their screen time, and their friendships.
But there is one part of their future we refuse to plan for, because it is simply too painful to imagine: A future where we aren’t there.
It is the single most terrifying thought for any parent. But as I discussed in my recent interview on Cape Talk, avoiding the topic doesn’t protect our children. In fact, it leaves them vulnerable.
We often assume that if something happens to us, our partners or parents will “figure it out.” And they will, eventually. But at what cost to your child’s sense of stability?
The “Invisible Manual” in Your Head
There is a concept called the “Mental Load.” It refers to the thousands of tiny details that moms store in their heads.
You know that the youngest needs the specific blue teddy bear to sleep, or he will scream for hours.
You know that the eldest gets hay fever in September and needs her antihistamine before school.
You know the pin code for the school gate.
You know which friends are “safe” for playdates and which ones aren’t.
If you were to pass away tomorrow, that “Invisible Manual” vanishes with you. Your Will might appoint a legal guardian, but it doesn’t tell them that your daughter is terrified of thunder or that your son is allergic to penicillin.
A Last Will and Testament is essential. It says: “If I die, my sister Sarah becomes the legal guardian.”
But Sarah doesn’t know the routine. Sarah doesn’t know the pediatrician’s name. Sarah doesn’t know that Tuesday is library day and the book bag needs to be packed on Monday night.
For a mother, those practical things are the difference between a child feeling safe and a child feeling lost.
From the EWN Feature:
“Should it happen that you pass away… your family will have access to all the information that they need… rather than going through the chaos of not knowing where anything is.”
3 Pillars of Childcare Logistics You Must Document
Our planner is designed to guide you through these specific categories so you don’t have to rely on your memory.
1. Medical & Health
This is non-negotiable.
Allergies: Food, medication, and environmental triggers.
Doctors: The name and number of the pediatrician who knows your child’s history.
The “Road to Health” Card: Where is it kept? (Essential for vaccinations).
Medical Aid: What is the plan number and who is the main member?
2. School & Routine
Routine is comfort for grieving children.
Logistics: How do they get to school? Who is the lift club driver? What is the password for the collection app?
Uniforms: Where do you buy them? What size are they currently wearing?
Extra-Murals: What days is swimming? Where are the ballet shoes kept?
3. The “Comfort” Details
These are the things a lawyer would never think of, but a mother knows are vital.
Bedtime Routine: Do they need a nightlight? A specific story?
Food: What are their favourite comfort meals? What will they absolutely refuse to eat?
Tech: What are the parental control passwords for the iPad?
A Letter to the Future
Writing these things down is incredibly emotional. I won’t lie to you—you might cry while filling in this section of the planner. That is okay.
But imagine the alternative. Imagine your partner or guardian trying to navigate a screaming toddler’s bedtime without knowing about the “magic blanket.” Imagine the school calling because nobody picked up the kids because nobody knew the schedule.
By documenting this, you are effectively cloning your care. You are ensuring that your mothering continues, even if you can’t be there physically.
You Are The Expert on Your Child
Nobody knows your children like you do. Don’t let that expertise be lost.
As heard on Cape Talk, this tool is helping South African moms face the unthinkable with courage and practical preparation. It is the ultimate protection plan for your most precious legacy.
Preserve Your Mothering Manual
Download the guide that helps you document the details that matter most.
